Store Bought Hangover
by Ladelle
Summary: Naruto's got to get some cash and isn't afraid to break the law. Too bad he's got bad luck, a cop father, and a guy that just refuses to believe he's not gay. SasuNaru
1. Chapter 1

**Store-Bought Hangover**

* * *

**Author:** Ladelle

**Rating:** T-M

**Comments:** Oh, plot bunnies. I work at a bank and came up with this funny scenario the other day, and my co-workers wanted me to write it. Don't even ask how I got them into reading Naruto fanfiction, especially when they don't even know what anime is. And...yaoi, fanfiction too. :sweatdrop:

But yeah. This will be like a four-shot one day. I just had to write it now while it was in my head.

* * *

**Chapter 1: Getting Ahead of Himself**

If there was anything Naruto wasn't prepared for, it was breaking the law. But hey, there was always that saying that desperate times called for desperate measures. In this case that phrase was a bit of an understatement, something a twenty-three year old college student wasn't too hesitant to admit. But on a lighter note, he wasn't afraid.

A deep inhalation of breath brought his chest closer to his chin, and his eyes narrowed like John Wayne's, a paper cup he could pretend was tumbleweed bouncing across the parking-lot blacktop before him. His lip dropped and he bared his teeth a little, all before taking one grandiose step forward. Hands met handles, muscles lended a pull, and a wave of something made him stumble back a bit, eyes watering.

Air conditioning.

Banks always had the best kind. The icy wind that bit at your features and made your face looked pinched just in time for a teller to wonder why on earth you looked so angry. They also had that air conditioned smell too; the wafting scent of what the public could only assume was money curling the hair of any nostril that dared to enter.

Blue eyes peeked around the pristine building.

The island was first base.

If he could make it there he could pretend to fill out a deposit slip, all while deciding which teller looked easy-enough shaken. The cool marble counter top made his fingers numb at the touch, and his skin prickled at the coolness as he glanced up at the teller line-up, his hand searching absently for a slip. Feeling for one; fingers climbing the racks without his eyes to guide them, all while his attention remained stuck to a pretty little blonde thing nearest to the door.

_Bingo_, he thought, and just as the decision overwhelmed him his hand knocked over a pamphlet rack, sending a loud and crackling _boom_ throughout the empty lobby.

"Shit," he said numbly, and he jumped to the ground to grab all of the brochures and to also collect himself, popping back up like a daisy. Eyes narrowed, he scanned the teller line again. No one was watching—_hey_!

There _was_ someone watching. A guy, in the middle. An attractive guy; probably one of those types that got any girl he wanted, simply because he looked the part. His jaw was pronounced despite the fact he was Asian, and he was staring Naruto down in an awkward sort of sultry seduction—that or complete irritation.

Yeah, it was irritation.

Glancing to the side, Naruto searched for the blonde, happy when he spotted her staring at her computer screen. Deciding to just get this done and over with, Naruto forwent the deposit slip, surmising to just do it the old fashioned way and demand the money.

He stepped up to the line, his eyes practically boring into the blonde in order to get her to tear her attention away from the keyboard she was currently mashing holes into with her fingers.

"I can help you over here."

It was that guy. Naruto stared at the blonde harder.

_Obey my will! Look at me!_

Her eyes didn't part with her computer.

"Sir." The voice was curt, almost demanding. Taking one last stare at the blonde-haired blue-eyed beauty, Naruto let out an inward sigh, swiveling in his spot in order to approach the guy seated in the middle.

Slight change in plan.

There was _no_ way he could tell a guy, 'gimme all you got'. And that was the exact phrase he had planned on using. At least with a girl he could pretend they were in a club and he was putting out, but _here_…and to a guy? Hell no.

He'd have to write it instead.

"Do you have a sticky note?" _Why didn't you ask for ad deposit slip, you knucklehead??_

Eyes so dark they bore no color at all narrowed at him. Naruto's squinted in return.

"…deposit slip?" he tried again, moving his hand a bit in a way that hinted he intended to write something. Those dark eyes didn't leave his own, and by fluke Naruto noticed a shiny nametag on his left polo-pleated breast.

Sasuke.

How did you even pronounce that?

"There are deposit slips at the island."

Naruto stared. _Seriously?_ If he weren't so stubborn Naruto would have thought to try this whole robbery thing another day but unfortunately, things couldn't wait.

"Yeah, and they're also somewhere on your station," Naruto quipped, brandishing his condescending remark with an award winning smile. The glare increased and the man frowned.

"I'm not giving you one," 'Sasuke' said, and Naruto frowned.

"Why not?"

There was a pause.

"Because I'm not giving you my number."

"Heh…" Wait a minute. "Say _what?"_

"You heard me. Sorry to burst your bubble. I don't date idiots." And with that the dark haired man turned to his computer, looking as though he suddenly had something very serious to attend to.

"That's…ewww!" Naruto's jaw dropped. "I wasn't trying to—what the—ewwwww!"

A dark eyebrow quirked and Naruto stared at the teller in ghosted confusion. "I want a deposit slip!"

"No."

Naruto fumed. "I'm a paying customer—well, sort of—and I demand a deposit slip at once, Sas—Sasu…Mr. Sassy-pants!"

A burst of bubbling laughter erupted from the other end of the line where the blonde's head quickly ducked out of sight. Naruto frowned. He was getting nowhere with this.

"If you're going to speak to me in that tone, I'm going to be forced to call security," 'Sasuke' said with boredom, and Naruto's nostrils flared.

"_You…!_ You're lucky!" Naruto pointed at him and turned in a huff, storming towards the door. "Next time…_Next_ time…!"

And with that, he ducked out of the building.

The nerve!

As Naruto walked a bristling path towards his car he hardly noticed the man in a ski-mask fly past him, headed for the door.

"That measly sonnova…and he's _gay!_" Naruto's face contorted again at the prospect of asking for his number. Although, it wasn't as if he was unattractive…

"Oh no…!" Naruto grabbed his head and crouched himself into a ball on the ground, pouting to himself. "Now he's made me _curious…!"_

Eyebrows furrowing as dirty thoughts erupted in his mind, Naruto popped up, staring at the door. There was no way in hell he could leave feeling so damaged, without having even said an intelligent retort in his own defense.

He bunched his fingers into fists and practically jogged towards the building, his face looking a bit like a dog's out a car window as he braced for the impact of the air conditioning. Storming in, he pointed a finger at 'Sasuke's station and shook it madly, ignoring the fact there was a very tall customer already being helped.

"You…! You should be asking for _my_ number!" was his intelligible response. He nearly shoved the customer out of the way as he eyeballed the teller, not paying attention enough to realize that 'Sasuke' almost looked frightened for him.

"And what's _that_ look for?" Glancing down to the counter, Naruto saw a deposit slip with something scribbled on it. "Oh! So you'll give _this_ guy a deposit slip—" he said whipping his attention to the man standing next to him.

Funny it was so hot out and the guy was decked out in black, and even wearing a mask.

"You sick or something? Trying to sweat it out? Don't come to the bank man," Naruto said, shaking his hands in the negative. "Do you _feel_ the air conditioning in here? It's probably why _this_ guy's so cold hearted—"

Naruto tore his attention back to 'Sasuke', before glancing down to the deposit slip, finally reading the words.

'Gimme all you got'

Naruto frowned. "Hey, that's my line!"

Then it hit him. Blue eyes widened and met with the teller's, his lips pursing, his mind finally comprehending why the man across the counter from him looked like Naruto was a complete idiot.

A complete idiot in danger.

"Haha, well, um…yeah." Naruto set the note down and pointed at Sasuke, trying to laugh off the realization. "Well, it was nice seeing you again. Gotta run—"

He was about to turn around when sirens erupted outside, causing his mouth to curl up into a quiver.

_Am I going to be arrested?? That wasn't in the plans!_

"Everyone, on the ground!" the robber yelled, and Naruto gulped when he was grabbed from behind, something cold against his neck. Letting out a completely complacent sigh, Naruto felt annoyed.

"Stupid move," he said and his hand came up to grip the arm curved over his shoulder. Gripping it tightly he swung the man over his shoulder, the gun firing a hole into the ceiling. The whole move barely took any effort, and Naruto licked his lips.

"My dad was a cop!" he yelled condescendingly as the man smacked into the tiled floor, knocked unconscious. The room seemed cool for a moment before the serious expression in his eyes faded back to carelessness, and he dusted imaginary dirt from his hands.

It was only a matter of seconds before police burst through the doors, and Naruto's head hung low. _Now_ where was he going to get the money? He would have stared harder at the robber beneath him had a cop not ushered him away, intent on hearing a statement.

And really, Naruto didn't want to give one.

Hours passed and Naruto felt like death, interviews taking forever and police scattered like roaches on the linoleum tiled floor. Letting out a tired sigh, Naruto almost jumped out of his pants when a cool hand touched his shoulder.

In it was a pink piece of paper.

Naruto narrowed his eyes and stared up at 'Sasuke' before ripping the paper from his hand, not even bothering to look at it.

"I thought you might still want that sticky note," 'Sasuke' said lazily, looking bored.

Naruto snorted.

"And by the way, it's pronounced 'Sas-ooh-kay'."

And with that, the Asian teller disappeared from sight.

"Alright, you're all free to go," an officer said, and Naruto pulled himself out of his chair like he was a lumbering old man who hadn't stood straight in years.

"You may be hearing from us in the future—"

"Yeah, yeah," Naruto waved his hand, knowing the drill. He left the building and stalked towards his car.

It wasn't until he was home and plopped on his couch that he opened the note, and realized there was a phone number on it.

Naruto scowled.

"Ewwwwwwwww!"

* * *

**a/n:** Somehow this is incredibly funny to me. Knock on wood that I never get robbed for writing it though.


	2. not all of us are born to be criminals

**Store Bought Hangover**

* * *

**Author:** Ladelle

**Rating:** I don't remember, ha ha

**Comments:** I wasn't even sure if I would continue this, only because to me it's so cracky. But I was in the mood and got some hilarity going, and even the semblance of a plot! Hahaha! I hope you find this as funny as I did. I was cracking up.

* * *

**Chapter Two: Not All of Us Are Born to be Criminals  
**

It was beginning to occur to Naruto that he didn't make a very good criminal. This thought, of course, hit him like a sack of russet potatoes as he ran from the gas station to his get-away vehicle—which, with a pained sigh, he realized he should have kept running. Having the door unlocked would have helped, too. And maybe if he had left it facing the street…

The keys saved deep in his front pocket didn't make the situation any easier, especially when the big-breasted blonde clerk was pummeling after him, the pavement of the parking lot upturning under her heels as she plowed across it. Her eyes looked sinister and her lower lip was curled, and Naruto suddenly wished he had picked the 7-11 with the tweaked-out manager down the road.

There was no way in hell that guy would have jumped the counter and come after him with such brutality as this woman was.

He scrambled to jam a key into the lock of his car, doing his best to keep his bundle of stolen lotto tickets tight to his chest. His lip quivered as he peered up the monster barreling towards him—she was moving so barbarically that only one thought crossed his mind.

_I'm going to get caught._

His keys slipped to the ground and his eyes widened in pure and unadulterated panic when she suddenly dove for him, and he saw ribbons of lottery paper soar into the air before his head went ker-plunk against the blacktop below. He let out a pained mewl and suffered through the agonizing reality that he was suffocating in the woman's cleavage, and gasped for air like a drowning man.

"Don't kill me!" He cried out, scrambling about. "I'm a poor college student who had no choice in the matter!"

The clerk lifted herself from him, but not before pinning his hands so that he couldn't escape. From this vantage point Naruto could tell that she was quite attractive for her age, with blue eyes almost identical to his, and hair the same golden tint. She was eyeing him with a vengeance and so he kept babbling.

"Are you even _allowed_ to do that? You—and then you—what if I had a weapon??" Naruto threw at her. The woman was looking at him like he was just some annoying kid and then smirked.

"Thanks for letting me know you don't have one," she said calmly. She stood up and yanked him to his feet before crossing her arms over her chest—at least as well as she could with how massive it was.

Naruto squinted. "Are those real?"

The woman's eye twitched. "Pick up the tickets. And if you even _dare_ try and take off, Mr. I'll-Have-Fifty-Lotto-Tickets-and Run-Before-I-Pay, I _will_ catch you and find a way to make you suffer the consequences of theft."

Naruto looked dejected as he sauntered around the lot, picking up his lottery tape. Anyone who had seen his pride tackled from him by the six-foot blonde Neanderthal had left by the time he was finished, and said woman was tapping her foot impatiently.

"I should call the cops and have them arrest you," she said casually, looking him up-and-down. It was apparent from the expression on her face that he looked fairly harmless.

Naruto frowned and stared up at her. "Why don't you, then?"

After snatching the tickets from Naruto's hand she turned heel towards the store and snorted. "If someone's going to put you in jail," she said very pointedly, "it better be for something a bit better than this half-assed attempt at trying to get rich quick."

Naruto followed her into the store, stomping, and the other worker looked at him with unbridled fear. He ignored it and continued to look disgruntled as the clerk held his tickets to the ceiling, rambling off the barcode.

"Listen Lady—" he began, but she turned her attention towards him and interrupted.

"My name is Tsunade."

"—doesn't mean you need to be so rude." Naruto finished.

The woman named Tsunade let out a chuckle. "Did you just tell me not to be rude, even though you just tried to _rob_ one of the attendants of my store? Look at her, you've scared her senseless with your childish antics," she pointed to the other clerk, a pretty girl around Naruto's age who was shaking like a leaf.

Naruto suddenly smiled at her and waved. "Hi. I'm really _am_ harmless," he tried to convince. His cold and petulant demeanor returned when he twisted to take in the gargantuan woman still handling his loot. "And I _doubt_ she's afraid of _my_ antics. You're the one who busted the door off its hinges like—like…like some crazy person!"

"Mmmhmm," she responded, not even paying attention. "Hinata, how much were all of these?"

The other clerk was still shaking as she pressed a few buttons on her keyboard, nervously glancing from Naruto to her boss. After a minute, she spoke, and Naruto was positive that no sound escaped her lips.

"Is that right?" the manager responded, and Naruto looked utterly confused, almost convinced that he was going deaf.

"Look," Tsunade said, drawing his attention towards her once again. "I hate kids; especially brats like you. I don't know why you're trying to steal lottery tickets—"

"To save my dad," Naruto interjected.

"—but this isn't the way to go." She paused. "What?"

"I need the money to get my dad back," Naruto said hesitantly, and while for a small second a look of curiosity and sympathy crossed the woman's features, it as soon replaced with pity.

"Well, I guess the apple never falls far from the tree. What's his bail? Four…or five thousand?"

Naruto looked taken aback. A customer came in and Hinata gave them a shaky hello, and Tsunade thrust the tickets into Naruto's chest. "I'm not going to judge. Actually, it's a little heartwarming. You're willing to throw your life away for him at the tender age of," she paused, "How old are you?"

Naruto stared. "Twenty-one."

"At the tender age of twenty-one?" she finished. Naruto caught the tickets as she released them, ensuring they didn't fall to the floor. He then stammered to redeem himself.

"He's not in jail!" he said, and Tsunade placed gentle hands onto his back and pushed him to the door.

"Those tickets are on me. Don't come back here, ever again. Don't drink and drive, don't do drugs, and while it seems like a lost cause," she gave him another pitiful look, "don't be like your jailbird father."

And just like that he was extricated from the establishment and sent on his way. The door dinged as it closed behind him and he clutched the lottery tickets in his hand, all before racing towards his car.

Turning back he shook a fist and yelled, "He's not in jail!"

He grabbed his keys from the blacktop where they'd fallen and drove off like a lunatic.

* * *

"A customer left this in the lot," an honest man said, and he set a brown leather wallet onto the counter. Hinata thanked him and took it, popping it open to see if it was a customer that she recognized.

She squeaked and it fell from her hands.

"What's wrong?" Tsunade's head popped out of the back room and her eyes immediately darted about the place, scanning for anything out of place. When all seemed well she followed her underling's stare to the wallet on the floor.

"H-he…um, a w-wallet…" Hinata began, and Tsunade stalked over and swept it up, giving the girl an unsympathetic look.

"What? Is there a condom in it or something?"

Hinata's cheeks turned cherry while Tsunade flipped it open, looking even more downcast at whose picture she saw. After a moment, she let out a shrill cackle.

"Some kid comes in to rob my convenience store," she re-iterated to Hinata, who nodded deplorably, "and not only does he _not_ manage to get away, the idiot forgets his wallet. With his ID in it. With his name, birth-date, place of residence…"

Hinata watched as Tsunade rummaged through it, looking piteously at a few expired movie tickets that fluttered to the ground. She pulled out a crumpled car registration and shook her head sadly, all before plucking a tattered sticky-note from its depths.

"What is that?" Hinata asked, her nose turned upwards in interest. She leaned closer, trying to get a peek.

Her manager snorted. "Probably that kid's only friend," she said, twisting it to reveal a phone number scribbled on paper. "Or someone else who took pity on his poor soul."

Without much thought, Tsunade picked up the telephone and dialed, relieved when someone picked up. "Yes, hello?"

There was a voice on the other end and Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "Do I _sound_ like someone you'd know?"

There was murmuring from the other line and Hinata watched cautiously.

Tsunade frowned. "It's not my fault your _homeboy_ left his wallet here after trying to rob me."

More murmuring.

"I was a good Samaritan and let him go. Are you going to come and get his wallet? I'm almost positive he won't be coming back himself."

Angry murmuring.

"No, he is not in jail." Tsunade looked down at the license and car registration in her hand wondering what kind of moron would commit a crime fully armed with everything needed to put them away. "Where he needs to be, though, is in school."

The dial tone sounded, and Tsunade sighed.

"Is someone coming to pick it up?" Hinata asked, biting her lip.

Tsunade tossed the wallet and its contents onto the counter in front of her clerk and shrugged. "Probably. But he sounds a little demented too. Says his name is shish-kabob or something."

Hinata watched as Tsunade disappeared into the store room and turned to greet a customer that walked in. She tucked the license and registration back into the wallet and tucked it under her station, but not before getting a good look at the name.

_Naruto Uzumaki._

She had no idea why that name sounded so familiar.

* * *

When Naruto collapsed onto his couch, he contemplated death. Not a physical death, but the kind of emotional vacation that happens when in one day, you've lost every ounce of pride you've amped up your entire life. He clutched the lottery tickets to his chest and stared at them balefully.

"If you're all losers…" he threatened, shaking them high in the air. Letting out a sigh he sat up and tossed them onto the coffee table. He still had a couple of hours until the numbers were revealed anyway, and he was starving. A huge piece of his manhood had been stolen that day, and the only way he could think to fill that void was with—

"Leftover spaghetti." Naruto wanted to roll around on the floor like the pitiful mess he was. He had been eating that same spaghetti the past four days, making it last as long as he could. But now, his stomach wanted something else.

He scavenged through the cabinets until he found some oatmeal and eagerly heated up a cup of water. When the water was done and he mixed the oats in, he downed it like it was some new vegetarian shot, letting out a dissatisfied grumble when he had still hungry.

"Ugh, dad, you are an idiot to the extreme!" he kicked a lower cabinet door and his eyes widened when his shoe created a hole. He fell to his knees and padded the break with his fingers, hoping that he would ingeniously turn to Harry Potter and _repairo_ the thing.

No such luck there.

"Oh, no." Naruto fell onto his butt and ran his hands over his sleepy eyes. Looking to the ceiling he shook his fist. "This is a test! I _know_ it is a test!"

He thought for a moment and brought his hand back down. "Of course, I've never been very good at tests…"

He slouched back against the cabinets and stared, for quite a long time, at the gaping hole in his cabinetry. A small and metaphorical part of himself compared the hole to the absence of his father, but not for long. Instead, he was jarred for his small moment of intellect when a knock sounded on the door.

He fell flat to the ground and covered his head. "Shit, shit, shit!" he hissed, like a mantra. He wriggled across the floor like a snake, staying close to walls and behind furniture. Another knock sounded and he poked his head under the curtain of a window, trying to get a good look at who it was.

"It's one of _them_, they want the money faster, they might kill me—" he ranted, but his lips stopped short when he saw a simple black rousers and a white button-up shirt.

"Oh God, it's worse," Naruto ducked, running his hands through his hair frantically. "It's a Jehovah's witness."

Another knock sounded and he squealed, ducking and rolling behind the couch. "What do I say? What do I do? I can't _not_ answer it; it's a man of God!"

He rolled back over to the window and poked his head up. The guy was still there. He hunched back down to the floor and crawled back to the couch.

"I'll answer it. I'll just—I'll tell him something that'll make him turn tail!"

Popping up from the floor like a daisy, Naruto skipped to the door, closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. He yanked it open and said, declaredly, "I'm sorry, but I'm really gay and you're distracting me from my man-on-man daydreaming with your eternal knocking—"

Naruto's jaw had to of hit the pavement, but for some reason he didn't feel the impact. Standing outside of his door was the last person he had expected. The guy from the bank who had given Naruto his number. And the last person on earth Naruto would want to confess any sort of _man-on-man _lust to.

"You were saying?" the teller said.

Naruto screamed like a girl. Then he tried to jam the door closed. Sasuke was an agile little money-handler though, and slipped his foot in, followed by his hips, waist, chest, and head. Naruto gave up and stumbled backwards, waving is hands around like he was declaring surrender.

"This has all been a big misunderstanding! I am not homosexual!" Naruto picked up a potted plant in an attempt to hide behind it. "But you—" he peered out from in between a couple of branches, "you're a stalker!"

Sasuke was locking the door behind him and reaching into his pocket, and Naruto watched the movement carefully, is lips pursed. When a very familiar bundle of brown leather was revealed, he was taken aback, and stared cautiously up at the other man.

"You stole my wallet?"

"Of course I didn't steal your wallet," Sasuke finally said, frowning. "And what he hell are you doing? Put that ridiculous plant down!"

Naruto yelled, "It's not ridiculous! It's a money tree! I spent good money on this money tree!"

"It obviously didn't help if you're robbing convenience stores," Sasuke sighed, and he dropped the wallet onto Naruto's couch. Naruto felt dumbfounded. He had left it at the gas station?

Sasuke looked around after that, taking in the lavish little house Naruto called home.

"I didn't—I'm sorry for trying to rob your bank," Naruto said softly, still eyeing Sasuke from behind the money tree. "That's what this is about, right?"

Sasuke's eyebrows furrowed and he turned, looking skeptical. "You tried to what?"

Naruto almost whispered. "Tried to rob your bank?"

Sasuke laughed and Naruto was almost sure it was the eighth wonder of the world. There was no way someone like Sasuke even _smiled_ on a regular basis, and hearing his laughter was a bit…creepy.

"What's so funny?" he asked.

Sasuke wiped a tear from his eye. "You were trying to _rob_ me?"

Naruto set the potted plant down and put his hands on his hips. "Yes. So?"

Sasuke burst into another tangle of chuckles and found himself a place on the couch to sit. "You…should not be allowed in public."

Naruto frowned. "You're a jerk!"

Sasuke laughed again before he caught sight of the lottery tickets on the table and picked one up, weaving it away from Naruto as he dived for it.

"Give that back!" Naruto said, pouting.

Sasuke stared at it, and then at Naruto, and shook is head. "What are you doing? You're my age, right? What do you need money this badly for?"

Naruto stilled, taking in the perplexed expression on Sasuke's face. It was genuinely interested, and Naruto hadn't had someone to talk to in a long time, so he slid into the seat next to the teller and stared up with pleading eyes.

"If I tell you, you have to believe me," he said, and Sasuke raised an eyebrow but nodded, at least looking curious. Naruto took a deep breath.

"My dad works for the CIA. He was on a case that was really high-caliber, but still, he'd sneak me letters every month to let me know he was okay. He hasn't been in-state, you see," Naruto explained.

Sasuke nodded, not disbelieving quite yet.

"But something happened. I don't know what. I started getting letters, but not from him. From people that…_have_ him. They're asking me for money. I think…that they think this address is a government address, and not his home address."

Sasuke stared at him. "So…why haven't you told the government, since they can probably, you know, pay these people the money?"

Naruto jumped up and waved his arms frantically. "I tried! I told the police station! They thought I was crazy. They even said, '_for that amount, haha, you'd have to rob a bank_!'"

Naruto's talent at mimicking voices was amusing. Sasuke took a deep breath.

"You think I'm crazy too, don't you?" Naruto asked him.

"No." Sasuke said. "Do you think one of these will win?" he held up a lottery ticket, and Naruto looked at the clock.

"Shoot, the numbers!" He scrambled to pick up the television remote and found a news station and luckily, they were just announcing the digits. Naruto jotted them on his arm with a pen he found on the table, and sat back down again, reaching for a couple tickets to compare.

Sasuke watched him tally one before picking up a ticket up for himself. "Write the numbers on something. I'll help," he said.

Naruto looked over to him and felt something swell inside of him; something that made him feel like he wasn't so alone.

* * *

**_An hour later_**

"Did any of yours win?" Naruto asked, frowning.

"$50 and a couple ones for $2," Sasuke replied, looking a bit dejected himself.

Naruto fell to the floor in agony. "Ugh, what am I going to _doooooo_…"

Sasuke was quiet, and then he spoke. "I have an idea."

"Really?" Naruto looked up from his fetal position on the carpet.

"Yeah. Come on."

Sasuke stood up and headed for the door, and Naruto looked from the television to his newfound friend. Making a decision, he flipped it off and grabbed his wallet, stuffing it into his pocket.

"Right. Where are we going again?" he asked as they left the house.

"A friends," Sasuke said, and Naruto nodded and followed closely behind.

* * *

"I remember!" Hinata said suddenly, and from the store room of the gas station, Tsunade's head popped out, and once again, she scanned the room for anything out-of-the-ordinary.

"Stop it with the false alarms!" she exclaimed.

Hinata blushed and sank into her chair. It was night and business was slow, and only an hour was left before they changed out shifts.

"What were you saying?" Tsunade asked, looking curious. Hinata glanced to her and looked thoughtful. "Where I've heard that robber's name before."

Tsunade's interest piqued. "Really? Where?" She jammed a donut into her mouth and chewed while waiting for the answer.

"The paper. He's the missing son of some government guy…Minato…"

"Namikaze?" Tsunade asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah!" Hinata said. "So you've heard of him, too?"

Tsunade's face was suddenly very serious. "Hinata, I need to make some calls. No more false alarms."

Hinata nodded and the store room door crashed closed behind her manager. She looked to the clock and let out a sigh. After all, today had been the most bizarre day Hinata had ever worked. And that was saying a lot considering she worked at a gas station.

* * *

**a/n:** Hilariously enough, a mother of one of my co-workers used to work at a gas station and really did tackle a man outside over a stolen carton of milk. I hereby dub her my inspiration for Tsunade.

I also recall a time when I was writing some explicit yaoi something-or-other when two Mormon youths happened upon my door, and I caught one staring quite hard-pressed at a slideshow screensavor of all my collected art. Which was mostly yaoi, and sadly a good portion of it was from ygal. Needless to say, he was awfully pale, and really, it was the shortest convincing session ever that I wasn't the right candidate for their religion. Hahahaha.


End file.
